Dating Once Again?

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The following is from a guest poster who just so happens to be my neighbor and wanted to get in on the TPOH.ME band wagon!  Thanks neighbor!


DATING ONCE AGAIN

Dating Once Again

 

A New Meaning

Every year will give you a new meaning. A new meaning of courage if you have learned from your mistakes, becoming an endless opportunity to create new relationships that are better. Something that gives you the ability to see your life from a mature standpoint, regardless of how mature you believe you already are.

“You are not perfect and never will be… and… this means you still have growing up to do.”

The ability to understand that you have loved and lost is vital to build a new character, not walls. Maybe realizing that another or others have loved you and you were a fool not to care. Maybe how others have back-stabbed you and you realized they weren’t your true friends. An inkling to understand how you could treat your parents better or those who parent you. And maybe, you could be a better friend to those who are a real friend to you.

So many things to learn. So many things to apologize for or move on from. Maturity comes with a price. It is facing your demons and your ignorance. It can be painful or disappointing. This can hinder your ability to date with dignity. And, when you take this pain and let it plant a seed to progress in a moral and kind way, you forgive, you move on, and most of all, you open your heart to love again.

When we start to date someone we really like, we sometimes become fearful. This fear can manifest thoughts to search for a reason to stop talking to them or in a strange way – give the inkling to believe that you can do better than him/her. It’s a defense mechanism we involuntarily have to protect ourselves from falling in love, or failing the relationship. We KNOW that nothing has ever worked out in the past. Why would this work out now?

If you want love, you have to take a risk. If you want love, you have to let go of fear in order to truly be loved back. You HAVE TO SPEND TIME WITH THEM. YOU HAVE TO SAY things like, “I care about you” or, “I want to see if this can turn into something.” This is setting yourself up to commit to something and if you can’t do that, then you don’t want to date – you want friends with benefits.

Tony Robbins once said, “Most people settle for connection because love is too scary.”

Don’t settle, but don’t use fear as an excuse not to focus on love.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”


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